Thursday, December 30, 2004

Came across this street sign,anyone know where this is?

Did you give us a large 50p the other week?

Not far wrong?

Sunday, December 26, 2004

Christmas speech

As we reach the end of the year,I think it's time to say goodbye to part time taxi drivers who have come onto the metro system and bullshited us from day one,in the past we have encouredged these clowns for entertainment reasons only,but the more their is it's getting us a bad name as they let knobheads walk away without paying and the like's?So do us all a favor and knob them off,it's your livelihood in the long run!
God bless you all..................................

Friday, December 24, 2004

A Thousand Fake Heros

I dont usually do this but i'm plugging a locall band, i wouldent bother if i didnt like them,check em out a few downloads there.

Christopher Arthor Snellgrove

Young Snell strikes again,getting a flag from the merton,his passenger informs young Snell he would like to go to City Rd,being a bit worse for wear his passenger decides to take a small nap on the way.Upon waking up on City Rd,but arriving from the opposite direction fron Bootle the guy say's,"next time take me the shortest way".This sentance sent our friend Snell a bit A.W.O.L. to which he replied"shut the fuck up knobhead i'm taking you back"which took his passenger by surprise(as it would)so he came back with"O.K. i'm sorry can i just pay you now and get out""no you cant and if you open your mouth again i'll jump in the back and give you a crack"so Snell blows through and says"Anyone handy to watch my back while i throw a knobhead out my cab"so the guy was brought back to Bootle and extracted from his cab.Curiosity got the better of another driver and went down the Merton to have alook at the guy?said he was as big as Arnold Schwarzenegger.....................(in your dreams)..................

Just like to say "MERRY FUCKING CHRISTMASS" to all our readers,have a good one and all the best to you's all,thinking about ye's.....................................(i may do a xmass speach but there again i might be too pissed)take care.

What's going on,Phil Cassidy's turning into Albi?

Monday, December 20, 2004

Just like so send this picture out to our mate Paddy(41) who's just gone back on the cigs,"let me down big time Pad"

Monday, December 13, 2004

No stoppin this cunt.

Cought again....

Sunday, December 12, 2004

Santa or baghead?

Tuesday, December 07, 2004

Ive heard that one our fiends has aquried a leather trench coat,you may think this is a piss take,its not,i asked the youg man myself but he denied it was trench coat.P.S.he was also spotted opening the doors in the new strand in it?

Monday, December 06, 2004

Who in gods name is this young chap,who should have gone to specsavers,have a guess and i'll start giving clues.

Tuesday, November 23, 2004

David McCann Again (tut tut)

What can i say,just when we think our mate Dave has done his worst,he strikes again..................
Their kid (Mark) put a pair of shoes in the cobblers to be re healed and soled(like who does that these days)and asked their Dave to pick them up!Told him the price was 18.50 and gave him a 20 spot.Not only did he give him no change but he had the laces off as well......................................
There's a lot to say about moving to Crosby but at the moment i cant think of any?............

Monday, November 22, 2004

Have i lost a month or is it still November,if it's not me tell them in Norhfield Rd!

Saturday, November 20, 2004

Kevo was spotted taking young Barbera for a chinkies,nothing wrong with that you may ask yourself,birthday,wedding anniversary,day they met.Dosent matter,it was all cool till i heard for afters he took her to the movies to see what?i cant say make your own minds up?(give ye's a clue it' an English film,part 2)

Monday, November 15, 2004

Latest News

Jay Fisher had a hit and run while he had passengers in,Stanley Rd Bedford area,car was said to be a black Ford,an anbulance was called for his passengers but i believe Jay was unhurt(besides his concousion and whiplash)hope he's alright for footie on wed?And thats about all i think,i keep hearing about poeple who have hit this site and think it's funny but i dont get much in the reply department,are you's all shy or gay,anon will do,anything.Talk soon Ladies.Gaz
P.S. Congradulations to young Davie Kinder,His Mrs Tracy has just gave birth to a bouncing boy,nice one lad.

I'm publishing this becouse i think some of you might need some spiritual guiding?

Competition time.Guess where this is?

Phil told me he always mops up but i think he tell's lies?

I noticed the floor in our office,around the coffie machine was to say the least,fucking mingin,so pointing it out to our top operator Phil McCann,i was verbally abused and told i was born out of wedlock and i could be over weight!sorry for opening my mouth.........

Sunday, November 14, 2004

Where the road bends out to the right,there used to be a black plasic ballard their,guess who knocked that down?

(vinny 90(VD))"Why do ye's keep calling me Stan Collymore?"

Who's signiture is this?

Friday, November 12, 2004

Who's cabs this?

Joe Scully from Oz sent me this,i dont know if it's a joke or true?

Thursday, November 11, 2004

Tuesday, November 09, 2004

Some scrote palmed me off with an old 50p,so later in the night i picked groovey grandma up,being in their usuall shit faced condition,they got an extra large 50p in their change,roger dees............

Robbie The Rat

Robbie told me about a stroke he pulled and I must say I was impressed,he said,he was first off the Buckie bingo,waiting for sticks(an old guy on sticks that goes to Maghull,get a tenner for it)so he gets a short job to Marsh Ln.On the way back to the bingo he spot's a flag at Yate's,so further along the road he notices another cab on the bingo rank,then spot's stick's coming out the bingo,so Robbie does the rite thing and blows through"theirs a flag on Yate's",the operator blows it out and the cab on the bingo rank pulls off and gets the flat on Yate's.Robbie pulls on the bingo and gets stick's...........................Love it,I really do....................

Alex.(Do You Think I've Got Sexy Eye's?

Alex(sexy eyes)

It seems Alex is a new member of the homosexual group,I heard he sat on his specks,totaled them,so borrowed his Mrs's contact lens's which had a pink tint to them,some of the lad's also said they could feel eyes on their bot as they walked pased him?

Sunday, November 07, 2004

Postman Pat

Jay 68

Young Jay sets off for his school run,pics up the paki's sister on Linacre Rd(School Escort)gets all the way to Formby Island when Jay say's "shit" The Paki's sister says"what"Jay replies"we forgot to pick the kid up in Maghull"oops?You may think this is just Jay having a bad day but in his own words he said"i've done it before about 2 years ago"what more can i add to that..........?

Thursday, November 04, 2004

David McCann

This is a sorry tale and i only hope Ian Swanny doesent get wind of this.
Let's start from the beginning.
Alex blew through to see if Dave wanted a cup of tea with him in the office.
Dave said yes and he'd meet him their.
Alex got himself 1 and left credit in the machine for Dave.
In the meantime Stretch walks in the office see's credit in the machine and has it off(as ye do).
So later on,Dave appears and says did'nt ye get me a brew ye so and so.
So Alex tell's him he has got him one but Stretch had it off and all that,so give's dave a pound and says here get your own and get me a chocolate.
So Alex carried on gassing and few minute's later remembered about his drink(or lack of it).
So looking around the office he couldent see it,so at looking at the machine their was no credit in it.
The story unfold's.
The pound that Alex gave Dave,Dave put that in HIS box,took out 40p and got his own drink?
What more can you say to that,i shudder to think!

Wednesday, November 03, 2004

Low News Update

I'm back at work tomorrow,playin footie in the afternoon,so i'll gather as mutch news as i can for ye's.Tomorrow i'm going to ask Snell if he want's to be partners in this site,as i'm getting the feeling that this site is losing it's comedy value,and as we are only here for a laugh i cant go far wrong,plus i havent the time on my own and we'll be bouncing off eachother,i'd like to say it's up to you but there's no reply's any more?i wont be back till at least Sun now Bye.

Tuesday, November 02, 2004

Guess where i went Sat night?(wish i didnt)

Sunday, October 31, 2004

27's back on the road from Monday,driving Postman Pat's van

Thursday, October 28, 2004

My Taxi Crash

Tonight,wed,i was driving along sefton road,litherland,when i noticed a car trying to get out of Ozbourne Rd,indicating right,i flashed the car to let him out to wich he hesitated so i flashed him again and he pulled staight out onto an oncoming car,which hit him then bounced off and hit me,twated my head but every time i told anyone they said"lucky it wasent anywhere serious"......"Whats going on their".

Doest look that bad.

Doesent look good

Wednesday, October 27, 2004


The other night Phil was entertaining Snelly in the office about 5am when our leader walked in and he wasent half impressed as no drivers are allowed in the radio room,but i believe the story got blown out of preportion as usuall,Phil told me to keep this under my hat?

Monday night going down Warwick Rd i spotted a white rabbit so i thought i better take a picture incase you's think i'm on drugs.

Billy The Bastard

The villans car in Towchester St.

Gay Stearing Wheel cover

Jay(68)Honest Citizen.

Tuesday, October 26, 2004


First of all I'd just like so say a big thank you to all the lad's who had a whipround for me,it was mutch appreciated and I never expected it so thanx again lad's.
Back to more serious stuff on Monday night a young lady came out of the Cat and Fiddle a little bit worse for wear and decided she needed to pee,so she drop's her trolleys behind a tree,but with the tree being about 4 inches wide didn't cover mutch,but then..............................The best is to come,she slipped and fell in her own pee.............AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH....Class or what.

Citizen of the year nominees are young Jay (68) and Billy the Bastard(How Cool's That Name),who witnessed a drunk driver hit and run and gave chase to the villain who eventually got caught,Police said they were very busy,that's why they took sutch a long time to turn out.

It appears i have been on the recieving end of some stick because Alf put a snake skin stearing wheel cover in our cab,does that make me a homosexual,i dont think so.......

Homosexual Taxi

Monday, October 25, 2004


As the year draws to an end,we have have had some prize one's,I nominee my self for losing my wallet on Sat,but their ye go,I'm on a bit of a downer on the MO,but ye know, I'll bounce back,it's only money,give me this week,to get myself back together and I'll be firing on 4 pistons.
Soon Lad's & Girls

Sunday, October 17, 2004

Latest News

I believe Billy Bean had an attempted hit and run Sat,sorry missed it,believe it was good,(come on lad's,no pictures,no one got a camera phone)end of the day I heard their was a good turnout and the villains got apprehended .Bad news our friend Brian Daily got oused off his cab coz of insurance details,let you know more about that soon.

Thursday, October 14, 2004

Who'd wear a pair of boot's like this?

Wednesday, October 13, 2004

Radio Settle Rise

Now that we've been" Metro Radio Cab's"for nearly a year now,the (bad)operators that we have now seem to think they are important,and want a rise in their wages.i've a point,why not give them shorter hours and ask Phil McCann to do their hours for free,makes sence,he loves the job and would do it for peanut's anyway,or else he can go back to being the doorman on stadard.


Their has been sighting's of a homosexual taxi in the Bootle area,a white taxi with a pictute of Goerge Clooney on the doors,the driver is also reported to be wearing a navy blue scalf,rhumer has it that it's not a taxi but an icecream van,and the sunroof is a serving hatch,dunno,have a word with the driver.Or tell tell the driver to have a word????


mark ready said...
jeff tells lies like jean eats pies (constantly)
he thinks hes slick but hes just a prick with no dick
he says he use 2 box he must of been smokin rox
he wasnt a priest he was a beast
he robbed a car never got far,got battered by me mar
he said hes got a villa but his bird couldnt fit cos shes the size of a gorilla
he never had mates always baked cakes wore a pinny and was ever so skinny.
9:01 PM

Monday, October 11, 2004

The Lads (



Saturday we had the sad news Billy Sanders passed away,he had been retired for a couple of years but he was still a star player in the cab trade.Goodnight Billy and God Bless...............
As soon as I get the funeral details I'll let ye's know,We'll all be their to show our respects wont we lad's?
Billy's funeral's at St Robert Bellarmines Church,Monday October 18 At 12 noon,interment following at Bootle Cemetery.
Bob told me a funny story about Billy,Ye know the 2 disabled places at the back of te Yate's rank,well Billy was parked on them when a guy came up and said.............................................
(member of public):excuse me,can you move your cab so I can park in the disabled place?
(Kirkstone Billy):Disabled,I'm older than than you,disabled,there's nothing wrong with ye.
MOP:I just want to park my car in the disabled bay?
KB:well if yer was disabled i would have moved but theirs nothing wrong with ye.
The guy then rolls up his trousers and shows Billy his artificial leg........................................................
Still did no good....................................Billy didn't move and the guy drove away...............
A good few years ago now maybe about 10 iwas driving down hawthorne rd towards Aintree rd when Kirkstone Billy flagged me down and said "keep an eye on my my cab kid while i grab this guy"i was abit stunned at first then realised Billy had had a problem with his passenger,so billy was chasing this guy who was going ape shit,shouting"you stay away from me you fucking nutter" and the like's,so Billy was being real calm and saying "what have i done to you lad,i've done nothing wrong"to whitch Billy srarted spraying the guy with CS Gas,but to no avail,it was like water off a duck's back.The guy gott off and jumpud over a wall,(the old railway wall)but their was no escape,so billy said to me"radio for the police",i wasent on a radio system then so i told him i'd drive down to marsh lane police station and tell them(it was open at night in them days)so i did my duty and then took a flag to Huyton,on my way back i thought i'll take a nosey,and their was Billy talking to the police,Lad in the back of the van,when a copper walked over to me and said"how many taxi's where their when this went off,i said"loads about 12"me and Billy.the copper went on to say "this lad stinks of cs gas which is a class a firearm and my boss is going apeshit"Billy was standing their with a bottle of windowline in his hand saying"this is all i sprayed him with"
He got off with it,but there is more to this story,That guy they called the flower seller,gone on the city now,i heard him telling the story saying he was the witness,and he said to Billy "yer on ye own now,i dont want to know"lyin fuckin tit.(drives a maroon cab,could be Billy Mah's)

Wednesday, October 06, 2004

So,what do ye thik Scot?is it a good haircut?"HeWay ta fook nawt ta fook wrong with that fooker?

Tuesday, October 05, 2004

Mick Kendal's Haircut

Our friend mike,on a recent trip to USA (fuckin globe trotter) was having a bad hair day,so wanders down to the local HAIR SALON,and politely ask's the young lady to sort the mess out,to whitch she ask's "have you an appointment"Mike looks round in amazement as their isn't any other fucker in the place,"no he replies",but makes an appointment for the next day ,the story goes he got charged $30 for this haircut,but hey can ye put a price on good looks.....

Sunday, October 03, 2004

Low News Update

Not mutch happened this week neither,I heard Leo Sayer had a pop at Shrek's dad,over gabbin and not moving down the rank,I must say,he does pick his mark,even if the rumor is rite about him being a black belt in mefuk yu.he must be a hard case with the bad attitude the guy has,but with the man's great knowledge,he knows fuckall about hairstyle's?...........
Believe their was a bit of a rumble in the Metro yard the other day,and a just cause one, but the other guy wouldn't take the bait, I think that's all for now,site's taking off really slow,not having as mutch feedback as I thought I might get,I'm getting more and more pissed off with the job as the kid's start throwing bricks at us,but what can ye do?
Sorry about that readers,i did go off on one here,had a few problems but things are sorted now,where do i start.......?

Anyone got a bail of straw?

Friday, October 01, 2004


A couple of drivers have developed an unhealthy bonding with their dog's,they've both discovered a game to play with their animals involving an erm short piece of string that gets dangled informs of the dog to get it to chase after it,no room for mishaps in this game,sounds nowhere near good to me but taxi driver's can de a bit odd sometimes???????

Wednesday, September 29, 2004

Monday, September 27, 2004


Just say hello to new cotributers to this site,we'll call them cont's for short.Vin90,ScotM7,Swany and Phil Cas.As well as as readers who don't want to be revieled,thanx for the pic's any that have not been published soon will,i wont be shy .........................Keep me updated and I will the same...................Stay laffin

I dont want to talk about anyone behind their back's but..................

Sunday, September 26, 2004


Another unnamed driver(new in the name game)unknown to him picked up an operator's daughter and started to go on about the state of our finest operator's(I'll get some boss jobs 4 that)Ste Ready the paki all a load of so and so's and other people higher than these(?????) in the end the poor girl couldn't take any more and said"talk about all the others as mutch as you like but don't talk about my dad like that"...................................What could you say to that.....I ask ye?????????

Thursday, September 23, 2004


( )This is an overflow site for unused pics................

Wednesday, September 22, 2004

Buying a job

Sat night,Sun morn,I was having a brew in the office when I heard Phil(Mr metro)give out a job,and said you want 25 quid on that it's going to speak airport.
Another driver blew in"that would have took me home"on hearing this Mr metro says well go round to the job,see the driver,give him a tenner and the job's in the future if anyone gets a job they can offer it out to see if anyone watns to buy it off them???????big question mark?

Tuesday, September 21, 2004

Last night I got a job and on the way a rat ran across the road,so I swerved to get it,on getting the fair in the cab and driving to the destination I saw the dead rat in the road,so I dropped the fair off and shot back to take some photo's(as ye do)

Sunday, September 19, 2004

Ye have to click on this pic to make it bigger to see the true talent advertised?????

F***off.i dont eat f***ing pies(ALBY G)

Me dress up in ladies clothes,what do ye think i am?


Friday, September 17, 2004

Someone sent me this pic of a driver looking verry homosexual?

Wednesday, September 15, 2004

The Damned In Concert

My daughter's let me know that the the damned are coming to Liverpool on Dec 5th witch is a Sunday,and I can go along with them as long as I don't make a show of them,so any other drivers wishing to go let me know.......

Tuesday, September 14, 2004

Buying Tyres

It got pointed out to me that a certain driver bought two tyres a fiver each,upon acquiring these tyres he left them at his brothers house,his brothers son is..............How can I put it?Light fingered,....................Upon seeing two new tyres in his own backyard thought it was xmass,had the tyres off and went about to sell them to a taxi driver,but it turned out to be the night driver of the guy who bought them in the first place..................................How funnies that?

Monday, September 13, 2004

Low News

Snell had the week off as well as Jay(went on a foursome with bignose)boss crash at knowsley rimrose,city cab got arse ended,mark 56 had a minor yellow one(thought he was a hard case)and i think that's it for now,as i say,keep me updated with any news you get?photos,goss the lot,i had a back window smashed on wed,Dave from the Mayflower had a brick through his windscreen as well,looking forward to mizzy night(NOT)

A driver sent me this pic sayin the passenger as well as being good looking was well dressed polite,witty and a boss tipper,hope i bump into the cool fucker........................

Friday, September 10, 2004

Kev the racist,on a recent stagnight in Blackpool,young kev was asked to leave a club,where he became very racist to a pakistani doorman.(i'll get back with the exact wording)
"Get yor hands off me ye fucking dwarf paki before i knock you you out ye fuckin smelly twat)

Thursday, September 09, 2004

Snell the mad prof...